Review #2 - Blondes and IPA's

For this second beer tasting the ladies in the group thought blondes sounded nice - cute and fun! IPA's were chosen as well to 1. be a stark contrast to the blondes and 2. IPA's are the it beer right now, not just with hypsters, but particularly in Southern California. It's all but mandatory for breweries in San Diego County to make an IPA their primary beer.

So, lets get to the beer . . .


Blonde #1 - Wychcraft
4.5% ABV
A dry tasting beer.

Christina - Smells like Coors Light! It's a beer my dad would like.
Kurt - The smell reminds me of a (cheap) beer from high school.
Ruben - Yeah! Like a beer from high school. No foo-foo flavors, just straight out beer. What teenagers should drink if they're going to drink beer. It's an expensive sporting event beer.
Lynn - Tastes like pee . . . but I don't know what pee tastes like. 

Blonde #2 - Stawberry Blonde
4.5% ABV
Very strong strawberry smell. Lemony, zesty, bitter.

Kurt - Mmmmm, smells like girls in elementary school. It has a lot of smell, but not a lot of taste.
Ruben - Oh yeah,  it smells like that lip gloss that Brenda Hughsman used to put on.
Melinda - This is a beer that you can put sugar on the rim and have, like, a lemon drop.
Lynn - Maybe you have to, to give it some flavor.

Blonde #3 - Afflingem
7% ABV
It's got floaties. You can taste the hops, but without the bitter hoppiness of IPA. In general, the group thought it was very good, but hard to describe.

Melinda - Smells good.
Kurt - More carbonated.
Ruben - Almost like a wheat beer. Kind of thick/syrupy. Rich in beer flavor.
Lynn - It would make you full very fast.

Blonde #4 - The Lost Abbey Devotion
6.25 ABV
Hoppy, tastes more like a mild IPA

Ruben - Tastes like a hoppy Fat Tire.
Melinda - It's thick. Looks like pee with a UTI. So hoppie my burp hopped out of my throat.
Lynn - It smells like farts.
Kurt - The bottle pours weird. It was hard to poor without a foamy head and it dripped everywhere. 

Blonde #5 - Alley Cat Amber Ale
5.5% ABV
Slightly bitter after taste, but smooth flavor while drinking. Very refreshing

Ruben - Whoa, I got a totally different flavor than the first sip . . . like my buds were confused.
Kurt - Wouldn't drink it with food. It has too much flavor.
Ruben - Yeah, except for pizza! It would be excellent with pizza.

IPA #1 - Port Brewing Wipe Out IPA
7% ABV

Melinda - Holy!!! . . . If I were to eat shit, this would go good with it.
Lynn - Can you write this down? (bitter beer face)
Ruben & Kurt - We think it's like something you could drink on a hot day at the beach.
Christina - You know what IPA's taste like to me? Like you're chewing on an orange or a lemon peel. This one, though, tastes like a 16 year old boy's . . . . . . . armpit.

IPA #2 - Port Brewing Mongo
8.5% ABV
Smell is not as strong and flavor is more mild than previous Port Brewing IPA.

Melinda - It looks like sewer water.
Kurt - It tastes like the last one, to me.
Ruben - Ah, smells like feet. It's stronger taster . . . it's strongier. You can tell these beers have more alcohol.

Lynn - Didn't I say this one tastes fruity?
Melinda - That was three beers ago.

By the 7th beer, the conversation had turned to farts, hot boxing and cartoons . . .


IPA #3 - Renaissance Brewing Company Malty Pale Ale
8.5% ABV
New Zealand brewed beer

Ruben - This is the best IPA I've ever had. It's crisp, not citrusie. A smoother IPA.Hint of chocolate; dark chocolate.
Melinda - Like how mom likes her men.
Lynn - I didn't make a face with this one.
Christina - It has a weird smell, like yeast. This one's bitterness hits the middle of my tongue. Smoky taste on the front. Go Kiwi's. This is a good tasting beer.
Kurt - I can really taste the malts
Ruben - Good to drink at a barbecue

Es bueno!

IPA #4 - Underworld IPA
6% ABV
Kurt - It smells sweet.
Ruben - Very sugary. If you have diabetes, stay away from it.
Christina - It was on sale for $1.99.
Melinda - And it tastes like a $1.99.

Barrio Beer Review Quote:
Melinda - "Addendum" - See, I can use big words.

Note: After beer #9 the conversation moved to menstruating. Ruben - "Hey, hey, lets go back to talking about farts."

IPA #5 - Stone IPA
6.9% ABV

Ruben - The typical IPA; little citrusie & hoppy, then a bitter aftertaste. Light flavor. A novice to a beer snob would appreciate this beer.
Kurt - It's the baseline IPA. You can tell it's a hypster beer - it has a long, self involved description.
Melinda - It smells like the first beer we had tonight; the Wychcraft.

Bonus Beer - Oyster Stout
4.5% ABV
Brewed with oyster shells.

Lynn - It looks like I'm drinking Ruben's dip cup.
Anonymous - It smells like a dookie yard. Doesn't taste how it looks.
Kurt - It tastes blah.
Lynn - It tastes better than I expected.
Ruben - I taste a hint of the sea.
Christina - A little salty.

And that wraps up BBR #2. Renaissance Brewing Company's Malty Pale Ale was the winner this round.